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Monday, October 9

Ecclesiastes 9:9-10

9 Enjoy life with your wife, whom you love, all the days of this meaningless life that God has given you under the sun all your meaningless days. For this is your lot in life and in your toilsome labor under the sun.
10 Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with all your might, for in the grave, where you are going, there is neither working nor planning nor knowledge nor wisdom.

I have spent the weekend morning lost hope and dreams. Wondering when I will feel free to fully hope again. I am worrying far to much about it all. Everything is meaningless..that's the message in this particular book. Everything under the sun is meaningless...hope, wisdom, pleasures, folly, toil, advancement....nothing will change that in the end we all die. Sounds terribly depressing but, truly, it's freeing. Why worry about all the things you don't have, why worry about the things you do have, the things you've been able to achieve or not yet managed....not once ounce of worry will change the end result. So just be happy and live life. Enjoy it for it's struggles and it's pleasures. Give everything and everyone in your life your best everyday. The days will keep coming no matter so why wallow in the things you cannot change. Enjoy life as it is now without expectation and without worry about the future. Take each day as it comes, live it to it's fullest and wait happily for the next to come.

Can you tell I am trying to just move on? To just let go of all the hurt in the past? To just let go of this consuming need to have a plan, a hope, a dream of what my life is "supposed" to be? Not sure it's working but I am trying.


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