oooh baby....

I'm a chatter. I've been chatting online since 1992, back when all you could do was hang out on BBS's. Dialing into someones computer and chatting with either the BBS owner or one of the other two people online with you. (if the owner actually had more than one line in). In that amount of time I have encountered a hugely diverse number of people. Made friends, found lovers, found love. I've been hit one and flirted with by many men. Most of whom, though certainly not all, are either stupid or liars. Pretty much the same as real life. I've met the ones that think they are just God's gift to the Internet and especially to the one he's chosen to bestow with his attentions. The stupid lines. The moronic half witted attempts to get laid. Virtually laid, of course, since I am pretty sure that the worst of the lot maybe hasn't even managed it in real life. Ever. If they did I would think they'd have some clue, some inkling as to how to really treat a woman. Unfortunately, there must be woman out there that respond to the lame ass crap these guys let litter screen all over the world. This is a bit of a pet peeve for me. That women must certainly respond to these guys. I mean, why would they keep trying if they hadn't ever had any positive encouragement somewhere along the way. We have some desperate woman somewhere to thank for these idiots roaming around out here.


I am babbling and I hadn't really sat down to berate the morons out there. Maybe that safety nazi put me in a mood tonight? I really sat down to write about something that absolutely cracked me up tonight.


I got J into bed, made myself something to eat and popped in a movie. I didn't sign out of IM before I sat down and really didn't think anything of it. The only person I watch for online was already fast asleep so I only half heard the tones that signaled new mail had come in and I didn't pay any attention to the chimes of IM's. The IM's were from yahoo. It's the only IM that I seem to get random messages on. I am sure there is a setting somewhere that you can set so that only people in your contact list can message you but the random ones are practically guaranteed to be from the morons I mentioned above. It's entertaining.


Usually, I'll return the random hello and how are ya's while I check out their profiles. The next line after the hello will almost always reveal their true nature and is when I hit ignore right after I type some honest albeit blunt explanation. Tonight I was jaw droopingly stunned with the stupidity of the moron du jour. The IM that chimed while I was watching my movie said. "Hello" and "May we chat". So oddly polite that I was curious enough to pull up the profile. Once I stopped laughing, shaking my head and staring in utter jaw dropping fascination I was filled with relief. All was right with the world the morons live on.


Please, read and enjoy. I'm not going to post the link to this profile because that would just be cruel but I had to share the best parts. This is unaltered, copied straight from the profile I swear.

Hobbies:
I like Sailing Thearter Dining
Movies my boat is misstress i all so love to Pamper Pleasure Please I am very
Seusual passionate perrson
Latest News:
if your in to d/s i make jewelry
for the life style thats can be used R/T im or pm me and ill tell more
Favorite Quote:
women are like the sea never know how the ride will be

Labels: chronicles of moronia

posted by dee @ 5:07 am